idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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