Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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