My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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