I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize