Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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