Porn is love you can see.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize