I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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