The maid of honor just puked.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize