I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize