a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
i believe in u and ur pee
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
