Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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