I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
