Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Randomize
