And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
