we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
