wake up i wanna do it froggy style
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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