Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize