Texts From Last Night

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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.

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  (757): I am not having having sex with guys at the moment. (734): I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue. http://tfl.nu/51cx
  Replies (2) Good night (2233) Bad night (652)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year

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  (614): You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year http://tfl.nu/i8j9
  Replies (85) Good night (3386) Bad night (1562)
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  (909): View more from California

  so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.

  (1-909): View more from California

  I worship thee.

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  (909): so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed. (1-909): I worship thee. http://tfl.nu/jd00
  Replies (54) Good night (8330) Bad night (1310)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?

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  (201): My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud? http://tfl.nu/2vhi
  Replies (27) Good night (7896) Bad night (1186)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.

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  (217): The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool. http://tfl.nu/4pl2
  Replies (44) Good night (5292) Bad night (1334)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!

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  (513): the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS! http://tfl.nu/o380
  Replies (49) Good night (3241) Bad night (5227)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.

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  (405): Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues. http://tfl.nu/ux3u
  Replies (19) Good night (8456) Bad night (1165)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift

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  (406): Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift http://tfl.nu/uiqc
  Replies (3) Good night (886) Bad night (1244)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready

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  (515): P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready http://tfl.nu/rgh6
  Replies (15) Good night (1782) Bad night (1370)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing

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  (856): I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing http://tfl.nu/iy02
  Replies (10) Good night (1260) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?

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  (202): Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry? http://tfl.nu/phvz
  Replies (1) Good night (1479) Bad night (429)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.

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  (910): I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy. http://tfl.nu/uqk4
  Replies (2) Good night (1024) Bad night (380)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.

  (858): View more from California

  I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.

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  (224): I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman. (858): I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect. http://tfl.nu/7efm
  Replies (3) Good night (815) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.

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  (720): Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality. http://tfl.nu/zwr4
  Replies (0) Good night (454) Bad night (320)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s

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  (520): WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s http://tfl.nu/7o05
  Replies (4) Good night (368) Bad night (531)

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