Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat? http://tfl.nu/57e1
  Replies (25) Good night (3065) Bad night (929)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you. http://tfl.nu/620d
  Replies (20) Good night (5749) Bad night (1093)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party. http://tfl.nu/xsn8
  Replies (30) Good night (1278) Bad night (4470)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical. http://tfl.nu/h352
  Replies (131) Good night (14572) Bad night (3128)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians

  (503): View more from Oregon

  How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians (503): How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often? http://tfl.nu/gll8
  Replies (20) Good night (5299) Bad night (1185)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people? http://tfl.nu/ymsz
  Replies (14) Good night (3668) Bad night (1698)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up http://tfl.nu/r4jy
  Replies (6) Good night (2563) Bad night (772)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club http://tfl.nu/6yea
  Replies (8) Good night (5374) Bad night (1098)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious http://tfl.nu/u252
  Replies (4) Good night (764) Bad night (1645)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet http://tfl.nu/qweh
  Replies (5) Good night (1617) Bad night (700)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (405): That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number?? http://tfl.nu/hwoq
  Replies (6) Good night (1362) Bad night (659)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (317): I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too http://tfl.nu/ini4
  Replies (11) Good night (646) Bad night (1393)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee" http://tfl.nu/ycun
  Replies (1) Good night (473) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur http://tfl.nu/mu3r
  Replies (0) Good night (732) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman. http://tfl.nu/nljs
  Replies (5) Good night (350) Bad night (733)

Randomize