erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
We are all done wearing pants today
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
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