Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
