I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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