when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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