I think I am morally bankrupt
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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