Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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