Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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