she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
