We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Randomize
