LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
