You made me cry and you don't even care
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
