He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
