your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
