I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize