Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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