Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
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