I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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