I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Randomize