How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize