There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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