Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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