my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize