all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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