trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
