try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
