I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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