that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
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In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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