My nipple is on Facebook.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
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