I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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