Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
