i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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