I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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