clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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